“Remember when you could just throw a girl in a volcano?” Now they use a “Cabin in the Woods”

Cabin in the Woods (2012) Movie Poster

Cabin in the Woods can be described as the 2010s version of every cheesy classic horror trope, done in a relatively non-cheesy way. Every cliché seems to have reasoning in this film, unlike many of its predecessors. 

A group of college students (including Chris Hemsworth, known for playing “Thor” in the Marvel Cinematic Universe) take up a chance to stay at (you guessed it) a cabin in the woods. When a trap door opens up and leads them to the basement, the group unknowingly awakens an undead family that will ultimately take most of their lives. 

However, the movie simultaneously follows members of a company that slowly reveal they’re the real reason behind everything happening to the kids. Each year, this company, and others like it around the world, set up situations to make five sacrifices to appease dormant gods. Those five individuals have to at least loosely fit the cliché archetypes of “an athlete, whore, scholar, fool, and virgin.”

Time- 10

This movie really hasn’t been out all that long and it already seems that people are taking a heavy liking to it in the horror community. Recently in a Facebook group called Horror Family, the members voted in 10 rounds for their favorite of 10 horror movies, then the top picks of each round were put in one last poll, and Cabin in the Woods was actually ranked #1 from all 100 movies in question. This movie sits at just over an hour and a half, with a lot happening in each section of the film, so pacing works well for the shorter length. 

Cinematography/Editing- 7

It’s quite interesting in the first rewatch to consider the cinematography because a lot of it is supposed to be decided on and changed by the characters themselves, and I think the crew does an incredible job of showing their decision making through the characters and then how that fits into the sequences with the college students. 

Rewatchability- 6

The twist of the movie breaking the stereotype of a killer going after kids in the woods makes it really easy to want to rewatch. Now that I’ve done so several times, I’m more at the point of rewatching once every other year or so, and when showing new viewers a horror that can use stereotypes to their advantage. 

Plot- 10

The plot is what makes this one of my personal favorite horrors, in that there’s really not a subgenre of horror missing from it. Overall, the film has a lot of comedic relief throughout, and used several 80s Slasher tropes as a starting point, but then tapped into Psychological in allowing the characters to decide their own fate. Many similar characters to major ones across the decades of horror are portrayed in the second half, mainly showing recognizable creatures from Fantasy and Supernatural Horrors. They’re all released to attack the company staff, transforming into a Splatter Film. With the twist of all reasoning being because of angry gods, one could argue Cabin in the Woods should actually be considered a Religious Horror. Some might say that using all subgenres of horror in one movie can get messy, but I think the slow development and transitions into them just make this film an astonishing amalgamation of all the greats in horror. 

Acting- 7

The most interesting thing about the main characters is that on a base level, they really don’t actually fit the archetypes needed for the ritual, but rather become them the more time they spend in the cabin. The main cast portrays these slight changes over the first half of the movie extremely well, especially in how they change their expressions and reactions to new situations with different decision-making. It’s also interesting to watch the company workers respond to this by altering the atmosphere in and around the cabin to change them into the type of people they require. 

Costume Design/Special Effects- 6

The characters from other horrors are where this best comes into play for me. The fact that they’re all so recognizable while adhering to copyright laws is mindblowing, and so is the way they all have unique abilities and… strengths if you will.

Gruesome Factor- 8

As said before, most of the end is an absolute bloodbath once all the potential creatures that could be awakened were released. The rest of the movie is relatively gruesome anyway, but upon reaching the point where elevator after elevator starts delivering pure evil on the staff, I decided this is probably one of the goriest movies I’ve seen.

Shock Value- 8

This movie has one of the best twists I’ve ever seen. If you really pay attention, it’s possible to see the whole time that this isn’t just another ‘kids get killed in the woods’ kind of movie, but it certainly strings viewers along as if that’s all it is.

Believability- 6

The fact that the cause of this whole movie is due to angry gods makes the storyline overall unbelievable to our real life existence. But the storyline gives reasoning behind all of the creatures existing and horrible things that happen to the students. For that, I’d say this movie is believable enough for its own timeline, but not entirely for ours.

Ending- 4

The very ending of this movie is both hilariously relatable and also a bit strange. The final girl is mainly meant to suffer but doesn’t have to die for the ritual to work, but because the fool remains alive, the ritual is officially incomplete. Rather than saving the world with one last sacrifice, the pair decide to simply share a joint in the very bottom level of the compound and wait for the unpleased gods to rise up and end the world. This choice never really personally sat right with me, as I’m more of a “greater good’ type of person, but I guess I’m just glad I’ll never really have to make that kind of decision. 

Total: 72%

Most points were lost in categories that were simply not super special in the grand scheme of movie-making. But overall, I think Cabin in the Woods is a pretty spectacular movie. It’s a classic storyline retold through pulling inspiration from many other horrors out of a hat, and I think that in itself makes this a unique movie and I think we all know the world could use more of those right now.